Top 10 Tips to Make a Meal Sexy (or at least how to avoid tears)

Having visited www.match.com aphrodisiac café in Soho square, I started thinking about what makes a meal sexy!   Sadly I’ve come to the conclusion it isn’t all about the food, it is about the experience.  So herewith the collective wisdom of my friends and I:

• Bear in mind the reason for the meal – Ultimately, this is not an opportunity for you to challenge Marco Pierre White but to show the person you love that you care about them so think modest and tasty! Someone huddled in the corner of a kitchen sobbing over choux pastry is rarely sexy.
• Think about allergies and dislikes – Nothing kills a mood faster than anaphylactic shock or hives, it just isn’t very conducive so think about what they generally won’t eat and look out for hidden nasties. Having attempted to kill one of my friend’s girlfriends (now wife) by feeding her pesto bread (forgot about the pine nuts), I can testify that it is not great for the love life.
• A little planning goes a long way – While spontaneity is obviously great, a little planning (even if you don’t tell her/him) means you have what you need in the kitchen and you have the time to make it.
• Clean up as you go – When my ex used all the pans in the kitchen to cook spaghetti and even managed to cover the cat in pomodoro, my libido was not increased by having to clear up the mess and the moggy.  We are no longer together but I blame his desire to be a samurai knight rather than his cooking ….. probably best to leave it at that.
• Set the scene – For some this may be candles, chocolates and fancy wine!  But for others – and I’m thinking of those who are married with lots of hyperactive little people – it might be something as simple as getting the grandparents to baby sit or tidying up the lounge so your beloved can enjoy a guilt-free pre-dinner drink.
• Portion Size – Faced with a man-sized portion of pasta, my friend picked around the edges only to be asked if everything was okay.  The food was lovely, the portion which was roughly enough to feed a small family was not.   Also, too much heavy food tends to make me sleepy which again is a turn-off to most normal people.
• Drink in moderation – A little alcohol to loosen yourself up can be great for a fun night but falling asleep in your soup, being sick or declaring your undying love through choked sobs is unlikely to get you the end result you wanted.
• Make it your own – Some couples love a night with moonlight, candles and bubbles but to others a good movie, homemade pizza and beer is just as much fun.  Don’t force it – just because you haven’t superheated your upstairs neighbours flat with the sheer power of the candles you are using – doesn’t mean that it won’t float your boats so to speak.
• It you can’ make it – fake it – While, everyone would love to be able to produce glorious crispy duck and pancakes, the run up to a romantic meal is not the moment to learn!  So good cheats from M&S, Sainsbury’s or Waitrose are the way forward – you can hid the dishes if you want to as well!
• Be yourself but better – A seduction meal is not the time to discuss political differences, interrogate your date about their love life or tell them that you’ve always thought they had a fat bottom!   The nice man who shared his thoughts on my derriere did qualify the statement by saying ‘but I like fat bottoms’ but sadly this did not result in what he was hoping for.

With this knowledge under your belt, go forth and seduce your other half

Lx

Don’t forget to follow me on twitter @littleofwhatyou

So what does an Aphrodisiac Cafe look like?

When Match invited me to join them at their Aphrodisiac Café in Soho Square, I could not resist and trotted across town to see what it was all about!  A little pop up restaurant selling combinations of food that they - with the help of Michelin-starred chef, Pascal Aussignac - had identified as being good for the libido.

The menu swerved from asparagus to duck egg (with frosted beer) to Flamed Oysters and Chocolate Truffle and Armagnac.   I started with black crisp and aioli which was dried tapioca with squid ink aioli.  Now I don’t eat tapioca – lets just say I don’t like the look of it – but dried and crispy it was like rather weird crisp bread.  Not something, I would sign up for again but the aioli was a revelation – something about the squid ink made it just so very morish.

Then my Cured beef onglet, mulled wine and pomegranate arrive with my pomegranate appletiser (very nice btw) appeared.  What a revelation, the cured onglet was soft and meaty with a hint of Christmas due to the mulled wine drizzle and the pomegranate seeds gave it that crunch.  Glorious and about to be recreated in a house near me.

I skipped dessert and wandered back to the office – if not in a haze of desire, at least having enjoyed a tasty meal!

Yum – and Match does a regular aphrodisiac events so I may well check one of these out - www.match.com/events

L xx

Don’t forget to follow me @littleofwhatyou 

Galvin La Chapelle - why I need to marry the chef!

It doesn’t matter which side of the fence you sit on when it comes to the validity of the awards, if you get the opportunity to visit a Michelin starred restaurant, you get that little frizz of excitement. So when I booked a table at Galvin La Chapelle for lunch, I was rather enthusiastic to say the least.

The restaurant is at the edge of the achingly-cool Spitalfields market and situated in an old Chapel which gives this – the third restaurant opened by the Brothers Galvin – a soaring roof and touches of sheer elegance.   On arrival (having gotten a little lost as they also have a Brassiere attached), I was greeted warmly and then escorted to my table by the delightful servicing staff – really friendly but professional.

With thanks to www.cwconsult.co.uk

The table was arguably one of the best in the house – against the wall in a little protected cocoon of soft seating.  So glorious was the view and atmosphere in fact, that when my lunch guest was 10 minutes late, I simply ordered a G&T and enjoyed being in the moment (as those nice psychologists say).

When he arrived – having learnt not to be libellous or to be libellous depending on how you thought about the training – we perused the menu and I realise I had made an error.  I had tried to do Michelin star on the cheap – yes, we had vouchers for the Prix Fixe which was £24 per person including a glass of champagne.

Now the champagne was buttery, light and gorgeous but the choices were a little limited (3 per course) and as they were tacked on to the main menu, I rather felt like a child outside a sweetshop peering in at all the goodies I couldn’t have.  We chose veloute of English peas and truffle cream as well as grilled mackerel, fennel, grapefruit and cucumber to start.

Both were pretty as a picture when they arrived but I did find the veloute a little confusing as I had through it was a sauce but it had far more in common with a light pea soup.  The mackerel was good, it was nice and it was sadly just mackerel done well.  Now I know that I am being picky but I had rather hoped for more.

For mains, I went for the Grilled tranche of calves liver, pomme purée, Alsace bacon and girolles while my dining companion when for Pavé of  Icelandic cod, Puy lentils, carrot and cumin purée.  As we enjoyed a glass of white wine we discussed our choices and furiously googled Pave only to find this referred to any rectangular or square food – less exciting than we had imagined.

The liver arrived and I immediately resolved to marry Eric Jolibois.  I don’t know the man and he may have many bad habits but if he can prepare liver like this, I am prepared to overlook almost anything – potentially everything.  The liver was cooked to perfection with that almost slightly might be a little under done texture and the pomme puree was like very very good sex.   In fact, my dining companion did look a little worried as I was making happy noises as I ate it.

The Pave of cod also looked good and apparently the carrot and cumin puree was spectacular but I think that I got the better deal [that marriage offer still stands].   We finished with tea, coffee and little French truffles, macrons and cakelets.

So, would I go back?  Most definitely but I would probably order from the wider menu, potentially order the liver for starter, main and desert before wandering into the kitchen to enquire about Eric Jolibois marital status.

L xx

Don’t forget to follow me on twitter @littleofwhatyou